Two Years Without You

Dear Evalyn, Do you know what I've realised in the two years since I last held you in my arms? Two years feels like yesterday. We don't move on as grieving parents. We have to move forward as the world continues to turn - even if we are unsure of the direction - but we…

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Back In The Ocean

**Trigger: This post refers to baby after loss**   I knew it was coming. I could feel it. It's been a storm in the distance for quite some time, gathering pace, and so far I have been able to avoid it by constantly moving and darting out of its way when it has neared too…

Making Memories Without You

**Trigger: this post refers to pregnancy/baby after loss **   Dear Evalyn, We went on our second holiday without you this month. Last year, on our first holiday without you, we found out we were pregnant with your sister and this year she was right there with us. But don't think for a single moment…

The Blues

**Trigger Warning: This post talks about Pregnancy After Loss **   It took me a long time to love my son. With hindsight, that seems like an inconcievable thought. I look at him now as the beautiful five-year-old that he is and can't imagine a world with him not in it. But back then, in…

Sharing Stories

It has nearly been a whole year since I started my blog. A whole year spent writing about our Evalyn and telling her story, trying to raise awareness and fundraising for baby loss charities. . . . A whole year spent talking about my little girl. Evalyn's story doesn't change. That's the thing I've realised…

One Year Without You

Dear Evalyn, Do you remember when we said our last Goodbye? It was around 12:30pm on the 9th November last year. I was sitting on the hospital bed and you were there in front of me lying wrapped up in your little moses basket. You looked so perfect, so beautiful and in that moment I…

Be Gentle With Yourself

Learning to live after loss is a slow process. It is easy for an outsider to see a grieving person months later, to see them laughing and smiling and be thankful that they look like they are in a happier place. But I can assure you, we haven't moved on. We are just learning to…